Stories

Sanele* is a 19 year old student and a member of one of our Aftercare Centres. He has already repeated Grade 9 twice and did not pass any subjects again in 2023. The Aftercare Tutor found a Skills based school in Durban that would be suitable for Sanele. The school is prepared to consider Sanele as a learner, which also means covering all his fees and his transport costs. In order to be eligible, Sanele has to submit a psychological evaluation report. Fortunately COC were in a position to organise and pay for the assessment, which showed that Sanele may have a learning disability but that would need to be determined by an Educational Psychologist - which means another referral. The reality is, there is very little to offer learners like Sanele who are struggling academically at school, and sometimes when you do find something that might be suitable it is usually too expensive or impractical for the families.

Andile* is in Grade 7. Whenever we did health assessments of the School Group children, we always found Andile to be very sad and withdrawn. On a home visit to investigate, we chatted to the Gogo who is the main Caregiver. Initially the Gogo said she did not notice there was anything wrong with her grandchild and thought he was just a sensitive child who asked a lot of questions about his late mother, who passed on when he was still very small. As Gogo related the story of her daughter’s death and how her son who was stabbed to death by a friend at his home, her eyes welled up with tears. We advised Gogo to go for counselling with her grandson and referred her to a Counsellor we know.

Vusi* has been disabled from birth. She lives with her mother in a rental house – her mother is unemployed. The family uses Vusi’s disability grant to pay for all their expenses. The well-being of the child has to be checked often, as she has a problem with cramping.

Duduzile Ntuli is living in Coffee Farm with her 3 children and his brother. She is on TB and ARV’s Rx. She is weak and not working. She is getting grant for her 3 children. There is a shelter but it is not in a good condition inside. I fell very sad when she told us that her elder daughter of 13 years old is sleeping out of her boyfriend’s house and all of a sudden the daughter demands her social grant money from her mum. She wants to take it and have with her boyfriend she even said that she does not care about the food her mum will buy with that other money. The Mum told her that her grant is closed now trying to stop the child from demanding the grant. The kids are attending the School Group. I have referred to the Peer Educator and Area Coordinator.

Bongani Mkhize is a 7 year old boy who is living at Zwelibomvu near Ekuphumuleni Store. He was not schooling – the problem was that the mother left them alone with the older brother, but the older brother is drinking and not taking care of Bongani. The mother is staying at a farm working on a Plaza – sometimes she comes home once a month. Bongani told me that if he goes to school she will beat him, but other kids are going to school. Luckily through a neighbour (Nokuthula) who saw Bongani and referred him to the DIC. We are proud to say that he has been registered and doing grade 1.

A child from my school group her name is Phumla Nxumalo 15 years old living at Kwandengezi. She was a victim of Rape. Phumla Nxumalo is living with her sister, brother, grandma and grandpa. One Saturday Phumla and other friends were sent by his grandpa to Durban and Phumla did not know the place so she asked one of her friends to accompany her. On their way back they started at St Wendolins and the friend who is the neighbour was already drunk. She dumped them in one of the houses at St Wendolins and they were stranded because they did not have busfare, then a boy came and raped them. Luckily the boy was arrested the case is still on, counseling was done and she was tested and still need to go for counseling. Appointment at Open Door is booked.

Thoko and Doris have been in love with Joe for a few years. Thoko and Joe are on ARV’S, but not Doris. Both Thoko and Doris are on COC programme. Thoko is the one who informed me that they are in love with the same man. I have had several session of counseling with Doris, but she is in denial. Doris’s general appearance is very much unhealthy. When I talk about HIV/AIDS to her it seems as if I am knocking on a brick-wall. Unfortunately Joe has passed away 2 months ago, I have visited Doris and again referred her to the local clinic but she is still in denial.

During school visit I came across an 11 year old girl who told me that she is scared of going or living in their home. I asked her why? She answered “at this moment I am stressed and full of anxiety because my older brother who raped me 5 years ago is out of prison and though he does not live with us some people say that he is around.” On my dialogue with the girl I tried to help the child talk about her painful memories so I asked her to tell me how the brother raped her. She said: “I did have a good relationship with my elder brother, he is 18 years older than me. He always tries to please me in many ways such as buying me nice things sweet, chocolate and we often play together. One day our single mother went to town to do some shopping for us. My elder brother and I were left at home alone. He called me in his room and told me to come and see how beautiful his room looked, so I went in and suddenly he closed the door and tool me and threw me in his bed and closed my mouth, took off my underwear, raped me. It was too painful. I tried to scream but no sound came out since he closed my mouth. After he was finished he took me and placed me in our sitting room. I had difficulty walking but I tried to move out of the house because I was thinking he will come back again. I managed to go out and sat under the tree. I was bleeding and after sometime my mother came and found me crying under the tree and she asked me what wrong and I told her and she took me to the clinic. After that my mother went to the Police Station and reported my brother and he went to jail.” Now I hate talking or playing with boys COC staff is concerned and is helping this child cope with his situation.

A 16 year old child loves going to the Library and a man who is the neighbour asked her to come and he will take her to the Library. On the way the man changed direction and drove the car to the end of Dassenhoek where there are no houses and he pointed a gun at her and raped her. On that evening the child did not say anything to her family and she slept and went to school on the following day. Her mum, when she was making the bed, found a letter that was written by the child that she had been raped by the neighbour. The matter was reported to the police and the man was caught and he was out the next day on bail. The community came together and destroyed his house and cars and he ran away. The mother and child were transferred to RK Khan Hospital and to Open Door for Counseling.